Imagine being selected to represent your country in an olympic sport after making it through years of training day and night to beat fellow top athletes in your game. Â Now the day you dreamed of, trained and longed for has arrived; you finally get to challenge the best of the best athletes from different countries around the world. Wow! history now has it that you are an olympian. What a great legacy! There are three medals: gold, silver and bronze. Every olympian in the sport wants to grab the gold medal as bad as bad as you want it, if not more.
Finally the olympics is over – you gave it the last ounce of your sweat and blood, but you are not returning home with the gold medal. Not even the silver or bronze medal. How does this make you feel? If you’re feeling anything like most of us, you will be hit with the feeling of emptiness -both inwards and outwards. After missing special events in your life , making huge sacrifices and losing close friends over the years to train for this. Lo and behold, you are returning with none of the medals you committed your life and being to.
It’s crucial to note that in the olympics, world cup, super bowl or any other championship series, competition is totally acceptable and regarded as healthy  given that competition is the very reason why these organized events exist.
But!
As far as life is concerned, the concept of competition is never the same as the olympics. According to Carl Lewis: “it’s all about the journey, not the outcome.”
There are two types of competition – positive and negative competition. The olympics or any other sports tournament are examples of positive competition.
Negative competition is the type of competition that traps you. Â It manifests itself in form of limiting and negative ideologies.
Negative competition traps you in the form of the following mindset:
1. Â The “us against them” mindset :
This mentality infuses a polarizing feeling of superiority or inferiority to others depending on what side of the court you find yourself.
You are only happy when you are winning them and you’re dejected when we are losing to them.
One of the greatest ballet dancers in history – Mikhail Baryshnikov summed it all up with this -“I do not try to dance better than anyone else, I only try to dance better than myself.”
Unfortunately most of us still live this way. Living your life like you’re in competition with others sets you up for disaster.
2. Â The scarcity mindset:
The concept of scarcity is not only destructive to our growth as humans, Â it also traps your mind by convincing you that there is a finite amount of success to go around. You see someone else’s success as your failure. You view your colleague’s victory as your defeat.
This stressful scarcity mindset places you on a vicious cycle that makes you want to beat everyone because you believe they take away from you.
You find yourself worrying too much and always hurrying to get ‘there’ before they take it all.
The scarcity mindset puts you in lack mode, creating the illusion of limited resources  hence inciting to you approach every scenario with so much struggle and scramble. This is negative competition in it’s full effect.
It is very interesting to note that negative competition exists in all facets of our life. It has become part of how we do business with others, our personal relationship with others and sadly our notion of success or as we fondly call it -“getting ahead”.
Conversely, positive competition is all about pushing yourself to beyond limitations, challenging our status-quo, utilizing the support, skill, experience and knowledge of others to help take you to the next level.
If given the option to choose between – life or death, which would you go for? Negative competition is as bad as it sounds is a choice we make. Â The fruits of negative competition is comparison. Desist to always comparing yourself to others, rather compare yourself to who you would like to become 10, 15, 30, 50 years from now.
Ultimately, to escape from the trap of negative competition you will actively choose to always appreciate and value yourself regardless of the circumstance you find yourself in.
Winning isn’t always finishing first. Sometimes winning is just finishing.†Manuel Diotte
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